MEMO to Snow White & the Huntsman Producers:

June 1, 2012 at 3:24 pm (Entertainers / Entertainment) (, , , , , , , , )

MEMO

Attn: Snow White Producers & Execs

So you’re asking us to suspend our disbelief so much so, that we actually buy into the ridiculous premise that Kristen Stewart is somehow “fairer” than Charlize Theron?

Does “Snow White & the Huntsman” take place in opposite land?  Because if it’s set in opposite land, then maybe – just maybe – we could accept that wildly fantastical idea.

Here’s another idea for you folks at Universal: how about you cut down the number of luncheons you expense and instead put that money toward a round of Lasik surgery.

Kristen hotter than Charlize?  Your movie should have been marketed as a comedy…

Not buying it,

.

The Subjective & the Objective

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12 Comments

  1. Howie said,

    Wow. US Ambassador to Singapore. Governor of Utah. Candidate for President. Now a big shot Hollywood actor. Is there anything Jon Huntsman CAN’T do?

  2. St. Tracy said,

    Holy crap – I didn’t even THINK of that reason among the others to not like this movie!

    • JD Rourke said,

      Yep. Seems like there are plenty to choose from…

      • Amy Jo Steele (@ajosteele) said,

        Damn it. I can’t wait to see this movie. It’s more about Kristin Stewart’s youth, don’t you think?
        Baaghh. I’ve lost your respect, haven’t I??

      • JD Rourke said,

        For me, I suspect Charlize is ultimately envious of Kristen’s ability to hold the exact same expression, regardless of the emotional situation she finds herself in.

        Evil Queen (not Sir Elton) wants you dead? Have a shit-eating scowl.
        Sexy dude with axe wants to bed you? Have a shit-eating scowl.
        Learn that your baby is a vampire who’s eating its way out of your belly? Have a shit-eating scowl.

        K. Stewart has the emotional acting range of a Daisy B.B. gun.

  3. Someone Who Actually Paid Attention said,

    If anybody bothered to turn down the snark for a minute to actually pay attention to the content of the film, they would’ve realized that the “fairer” part of the film isn’t solely about Snow White’s looks. It’s about her innocence and purity, the good in her heart and soul. It’s not just her looks that takes the Queen down. It’s a combination of it all.

    • JD Rourke said,

      Damn you and your reasoned, nuanced thinking! That kind of attitude of yours’ really messes with our immature way of approaching things…

    • guesty said,

      Thank you for pointing out the obvious!

    • B said,

      A large component of the Snow White fairy tale is Snow White actually eclipsing the Queen in terms of aesthetic perfection. Not just to the Queen, but in everyone’s eyes. So yeah, looks have a lot to do with it and while it isn’t the entirety of the story (and shouldn’t be), there’s about a hundred other actresses who could have carried off the innocence and light part of this character ten times better than Stewart while also LOOKING ten times better than Stewart and comparable at least to Charlize. Fact of the matter here is that “fairest of them all” is what most people think of when they think of this story, and they’re all sitting around scratching their heads going “WTF” at this pairing. Maybe they didn’t have to pretty up Snow White, but they could have at least picked a less gorgeous Evil Queen to even things out a bit.

  4. Logi said,

    To me, it was the poster they have here in Germany – NO WAY

  5. bored said,

    Since that was not the actual intention of “beauty” in the movie at all, what is your point again?

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