Dearest Sarah Palin,

May 31, 2016 at 3:29 am (Daily Headaches and Rage Inducers, Politics) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Dear Sarah Palin,

We were going to address you as “Governor” Sarah Palin, but then quit halfway through.  So we’ll keep it simple and just call you Sarah.  Besides, this way sounds a bit more folksy.

We wanted to commend you – much as it grinds our gears, so to speak, to do so – and give you “props” for actually being right about a couple of things.  And by “right” we mean correct.

Firstly, even though it’s taken us years to admit this, we figured we’d finally chime in and say you were correct to quit the governorship of Alaska.  Honestly, based on the way fellow Republican Governors have pooped the bed (Mike Pence – Indiana; Paul LaPage – Maine; Scott “Koch” Walker – Wisconsin) and driven their respective states into the ground (Bobby Jindal – Louisiana; Rick Snyder – Michigan; Rick Scott – Flo Rida), your choice to abandon The Last Frontier State and head for Hollywood was absolutely the correct, greedy, shrewd move.

And we’re not even going to mention how Repub Governor Sam Brownback has literally (yes, correct usage) turned Kansas into a financially bankrupt Narco-state (it’s like Mexico without the good food or pinatas).  Maybe Donald Trump could erect a wall around Kansas as practice for future Xenophobic projects.  You know, “Make America 49 States Again.”

So, well done on quitting, Sarah.  You did the right thing.  Spike Lee would be proud (sorry – he’s black, we’ll try to find someone else you’d be more comfortable around).

The second thing you’ve proven yourself correct on is just how lame the media truly is. Really, Sarah, it’s impressive just how “spot on” you were with that assessment.  Who would ever have thought that CNN, Fox *News, and MSNBC would give Donald J. Trump sooooo much more air-time than any of the other Presidential candidates?!  Or that 8 years after Barack Obama and Joe Biden thrashed John McCain and his running mate, we’d still see You receiving coverage on anything even remotely political?!?  Seriously, that makes as much sense as going to Lance Armstrong for advice on how to compete ethically.  The only conclusion we can draw from this is that, darnit, The Media Really Is LAME.

Once again, Sarah, kudos for getting those two things correct.  When you’re right, you’re usually wrong, but in these two instances, you nailed it, sister!



Broken Clocks




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Dear Budweiser Brewing Company,

May 11, 2016 at 2:43 am (Daily Headaches and Rage Inducers) (, , , )

Dear Budweiser, aka Anheuser-Busch, aka That Belgium-based Brewing Co.,

We Americans just lerned that between now and the U.S. Presidential election in November your changing the name of Budweiser beer to “America” beer…

We’re a bit cornfused, so bear with us a minute.  Maybe we’ve sucked down too many cold ones, but your saying that when we stumble into our local AM/PM mini-mart, we’re now supposed to simply grab a couple cases of America?  And the Indian fella behind the counter will know what’s goin’ on?

You sure about this, Bud?  Do we even still call you Bud, Bud?

We get that you’r the “King” of beers and all, even if that kinda sounds vaguely Marxist, but this seems shameless.  First you move your company outta the U.S. and take a whole lotta American jobs with ya over to Belgium.  How would you feel if we rebranded all your waffles and just called ’em Belgiums?   “Hey, who wants some Belgium batter?”  Might sting a bit.

We just want you to know that we’re not dum.  We don’t like it when foreigners try to brand and package Our Freedom and our civil libertines.  That’s our job – dammit!

Still, we our the greatest country ever made by God in heaven and if something goes by America, then we ought to buy it and force it on our fellow citizins like Ronald Reagan would want us to.

But can you at least make a few commercials with hot chicks in American flag bikinis? Maybe a couple of them could be holding cans of America and AK-47s.  That’d be cool.

Fuck it, we’re in.  Sell the shit outta this shit!



‘Merican Patriots


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Dear The Walking Dead,

May 3, 2016 at 3:48 am (Entertainers / Entertainment) (, , )

Dear The Walking Dead,

See that?  That’s how you deal with a cliffhanger…

[audible of a mic hitting a wooden floor]

Feeling superior,


Game of Thrones

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May 2016…We’re Back!!!

May 2, 2016 at 7:01 pm (Uncategorized)

Hey there.  What’s going on?  Anything happen in the past couple of years since we went underground and into the SPP (Snarkster Protection Program)?

We cured Cancer, right?  AIDS is over.  Racism is done, correct?  Poverty wiped out. Education for all – wait, what’s that You Say?!?

Fox *News mouthpieces have spent more televised hours covering the 4 Americans who died in Benghazi than they have on September 11, 2001, Hurricane Katrina, and school shootings since 2000 combined???

Folks are screaming about protecting children from Trans-gendered people in public restrooms, but also want everyone to be able to carry firearms into churches, schools, and freaking Cracker Barrel???

Donald J. Drumpf-Trump is now a front-runner to be our next elected* President???

W – T – Fuck?!?!

All we did was go out for drinks, an occasional movie, and some good, tasty Ramen – and this is HOW Y’ALL MIND THE STORE?!?!

Fine.  We’ll deal with all this nonsense together.  We’ll skewer the bastards with facts, humor, snark, and a little something known as The Truth.  Let me grab my Big-Boy pants and we’ll get on with it.


Eric Frost-Barnes                                                                                                                                       a.k.a. – the Snarky Bastard formerly known as JD Rourke


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Top Marketing Ideas for the Los Angeles Clippers Season

April 26, 2014 at 9:35 pm (Daily Headaches and Rage Inducers, The Sporting Life) (, , , , , )

{Memo from NBA Clippers owner Donald Sterling concerning the 2014 – 2015 season and new, fun ways to market his team}


These are my top ideas for how to fully capitalize on the 2014 – 2015 season, and shine a bright, white light on the Clippers.

D. Sterling

Idea 1: “Associate with an African-American Night.”  I think this could be an interesting way for us to prove we’re not afraid to associate with them [the blacks].  I would still prefer they [people of color] not be allowed to attend the games, but if we’re able to convey our willingness to be associated, then this could go a long way toward us eventually tolerating them [maybe].

Idea 2: “Pre-Game TED Talks featuring Cliven Bundy and Phil Robertson.”  I believe mixing athletics with inspirational speakers could be a terrific way to enlighten the masses as to why older, white men are truly the definitive example when it comes to exceptionalism.

Idea 3: “Free Cotton-Picking Candy Night.”  Self explanatory.

Idea 4: “Kiss Cams featuring Couples of Mixed Race.”  By “mixed,” I mean wealthy, white men and their much, much younger mistresses.

Idea 5: “Half-Time Lectures on the True Meaning of Ownership.”  Again, this should be self-explanatory.

Idea 6: “Post-Game Screenings of Glory, Roots, and 12 Years a Slave.”  In my opinion, when people leave the venue happy and with smiles on their faces, they’re far more likely to become repeat customers / fans.  Besides, who doesn’t love a good comedy?

I’d like to get your thoughts on these suggestions asap.

Your owner / boss-man,


Donald Sterling

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Duck Dynasties, Our 1st Amendment, and the Hypocrisy of The Right

December 25, 2013 at 7:35 pm (Daily Headaches and Rage Inducers, Entertainers / Entertainment, Politics, Religion and other silliness) (, , , , , , )

I figured since nearly everybody else has jumped into this pool of controversy (or pond, given the setting), and you cannot swing a dead duck without hitting a Facebook diatribe, angry tweet, or know-it-all talking head babbling over reality-TV star Phil Robertson’s recent controversial interview in GQ magazine, I may as well wade in a bit, too.

I am a proud American and a proud liberal, and I firmly believe in our Constitution and all that comes within it.  So, while I personally disagree with the recent racially-charged and homophobic comments made by “Duck Dynasty” star Phil Robertson, I equally agree with the notion that as an American citizen Robertson has a fundamental right to make those comments out loud – however controversial, judgmental, and myopic they may be.

We all, as Americans, retain the right to our freedom of speech, and that obviously includes Phil Robertson.  But despite the claims of so many people on The Right, the decision by A & E  executives to briefly remove Robertson from “Duck Dynasty” was not about taking away his right to free speech, nor was it about unfairly silencing him.  All the proof you need is the fact that Phil Robertson made his comments to the GQ reporter in the first place, and has since been able to speak out about those comments and defend them.  Robertson’s opinions about the sin of homosexuality and, how back in the pre-Civil-Rights-era South, African-Americans appeared to be very happy under old Jim Crow laws have not landed him in jail, nor has he been fined heavily for them.  He was allowed to make his statements, as is his right.

A & E’s decision to suspend Phil Robertson from “Duck Dynasty” was little more than a reflection of our Capitalist system.  A & E does not want to lose advertisers, as that would cost the network money.  When any company has an employee who publicly says things which may embarrass that company – or hurt their bottom line – they have a right to reprimand that employee in an appropriate manner.  It’s funny to me that Republicans – the very same ones who claim anyone against the Free-Market is a Marxist or socialist – are decrying A & E’s decision as anti-American and a blatant violation of Robertson’s right to free speech.  That is simply laughable.  Robertson said some pretty ugly, hurtful things about various Americans, and his bosses – in this case the suits who run A & E – decided to distance themselves from his controversial comments; not unlike MSNBC did after their “employee” Martin Bashir made incendiary comments about former Alaskan Governor Sarah Palin.  MSNBC placed Bashir on leave, and he later resigned.  But you know what did not happen during that ugly incident?  Throngs of conservatives did not defend Bashir’s right to free speech.  Rather, they called for his firing.

“Those with that platform, with a microphone, a camera in their face, they have to have some more responsibility taken.”  This is what Sarah Palin said about the Martin Bashir incident, yet when it comes to reality-star Phil Robertson (a religious conservative) saying vile things about African-Americans and the LGBT community, both she and her eldest daughter, Bristol, came out publicly and claimed Robertson’s own rights were being threatened – instead of holding him up to a higher responsibility.

Ah, hypocrisy…

But this is how it goes with those on the conservative side.  Back in the early and mid-2000s, conservatives labeled Americans who spoke out against the Iraq war as un-American, un-patriotic, and claimed those who were exercising their 1st Amendment rights were, in fact, “giving aid and comfort to the enemy.”  This last little fun quote was courtesy of Michael Burgess, a Republican Representative from Texas.  Interesting how some of our democratically-elected leaders – whose primary job is to protect and uphold the laws of our land – will suddenly react more like a dictator whenever they hear something they don’t agree with.

Any time a liberal actor or left-leaning public figure speaks his or her mind about any subject that isn’t directly connected to their profession; those on the right will condemn or dismiss the individual, as though they’ve lost their rights as an American.  If I had a dollar for every time I’ve heard a conservative mouth-piece criticize George Clooney or Oprah Winfrey for their vocalized opinions on a myriad of subjects ranging from African aid to typhoon Haiyan, I’d be able to start my own television network.  Yet, in the past two weeks we’ve seen the right galvanize support around Phil Robertson, as though freedom itself were at stake here.  Guess what, kids?  It’s not.

Again, Phil Robertson said what he said, and whether you agree with him or not, he must be allowed to say such things without fear of being penalized by the government.  But that does not extend to our private employers, nor to everyone else who ends up hearing what was said in the first place.  I have as much right to vocally denounce what Phil Robertson said.  If we are to be for the freedom of expression, then it must be totally acceptable to our ears, regardless of who says what.  Otherwise, we’re not honoring our rights, but rather only our tastes and what we each find to be personally acceptable.

There has to be a meeting in the middle, and that is something that those on the right seem unwilling to admit, at least out loud for the rest of us to hear.


Eric Frost-Barnes

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The Right and the Disrespecting of the U.S. Presidency – An Open Letter to the Tea Party

December 9, 2013 at 4:59 pm (Daily Headaches and Rage Inducers, Politics, Religion and other silliness) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Dear Tea Party,

We get it, Tea Party; you don’t like having a black President.  In light of the recent government shutdown, it’s become painfully clear that the very idea of having someone in the White House whose tan is deeper than John Boehner’s is wildly offensive and unsettling to you folks.  And while it is your fundamental right to be on the wrong side of history, you self-proclaimed patriots have spent more than five years disrespecting both the office of the President of the United States, as well as that fun little part of our Declaration of Independence which states “all Men are created equal”.

You Tea Partiers repeatedly talk about battling the tyranny of President Obama and the unconstitutional power he wields like “a vicious African warlord” – very classy – and yet it was the previous President (George W. Bush, for those who’d effectively erased his name from their memory banks) and his administration who set up wiretapping without consent from the FISA courts, sat idly by while “Wall Street got drunk,” and sent well over 4,000 Americans to their untimely deaths in Iraq based on evidence about WMDs that a decade later remains about as “real” and “legit” as President Obama’s Kenyan birthplace.

Recently, one of the darlings of your T.P. movement – Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Canada) – had his father give a speech on his behalf.  And one aspect of Pastor Rafael Cruz’s speech was how he would like to, “send him back to Kenya.”  In case you were wondering, the “him” is President Obama.  In case you were also wondering, yes, what “Pastor” Cruz said was racist.

Now again – this time with feeling – you T.P. peeps have the right to dislike any politician, and you also have a right to vocalize that disdain, including and about President Barack Obama.  But if you’re truly about facts, integrity, and love of country, then you need to stop with all the transparent lies and hypocrisies.  Let’s look at the facts of the relationship between the Tea Party and President Obama and see just how from the very beginning this anger and disrespect was never about Obama’s policies, but rather about his appearance, a.k.a. His Blackness.

According to your own official website ( – on the “About Us” page – you TPers have been around for at least a decade, with the website up and running since early September, 2004.  On this same page you also list your 15 Non-negotiable Core Beliefs; guiding principles that you believe make you better Americans and staunch supporters of both freedom and our beloved Constitution.  Here are six of those Non-negotiable Core Principles listed in order as they appear on your site: #2. Pro-domestic employment is indispensable. #4. Special interests must be eliminated.  #6. Government must be downsized.  #7. The national budget must be balanced.  #8. Deficit spending must end.  #9. Bailout and stimulus plans are illegal.

If the Tea Party movement really feels these principles are that important, and if you guys have been around for at least the past ten years, then why didn’t you rear your enraged heads during the Bush Administration?  Why did you only begin to make yourselves known across America in early 2009, less than one month after Barack Obama swore an oath to this nation as its 44th President?

During the Bush Administration, corporations shipped millions of jobs overseas to places like China and India, which goes against Number 2 on your non-negotiable list.  Special interests ran rampant throughout all eight years of Bush and Cheney’s reign, hijacking both our political leaders and our banking and investing systems.  Even now, your favorite son Senator Ted Cruz (R-Calgary) has his health plan through Goldman Sachs, which was the beneficiary of a massive bailout in September, 2008, courtesy of Bush and his then-Secretary of the Treasury Henry Paulson.  These hard facts go against Numbers 4 and 9 on your list.  The Bush Administration also increased the size of our government by a near-insane amount – can you say Department of Homeland Security – and added to our national debt by trillions (while simultaneously keeping the cost of the Iraq war off the budget books), which goes directly against Tea Party Core Principles, 6, 7, and 8.  All of these facts are known to the American people.  Now, the good news is most Americans are bright enough to know when they’re being fed a big pile of manure, yet here you guys are, feigning to the heavens how President Obama is to blame for all of the above issues, as though prior to January 20, 2009, our nation didn’t have a care in the world, other than fighting the “terrarists”.  And let’s not forget the cost of human life the Bush Administration is responsible for when it demanded action in Iraq for non-existent WMDs, which led to more than 4,400 Americans dying and tens-of-thousands more of our soldiers coming home emotionally scarred, physically injured, or both – though apparently those last two figures pale in comparison to the murder of four Americans in Libya during President Obama’s watch (based on your unending Benghazi “outrage” for the cameras over at Fox *News Channel).

Major Tea party protests began within weeks of President Obama’s first term.  In February, 2009, you guys held a protest decrying the TARP bailout bill and blamed Obama for its implementation, even though President Bush signed it into law the previous year.  TPers also held a very public commemoration / protest on September 12th, 2009 in honor of the 9/11 attacks eight years earlier, many with signs questioning how a Muslim President (the guy from Kenya) could ever be elected in the wake of such horrific events.  Nevermind that the Tea Party never held a single large-scale protest of the previous administration’s security failures or their failure to capture bin Laden.  I guess you were too busy on September 11th and 12th, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, and 2008.

So what happened that made the TPers finally come out?  Why stay quiet for several years, only to make yourselves known in the days following Barack Obama’s moving into the White House?  And how could you be so upset with President Obama’s policies after less than three months in office?  That simply isn’t enough time to know whether policies will be successes or failures, yet you folks immediately, and irrationally, deemed him with the latter, as though it were already written in stone.

Now maybe you’re still not convinced of your own racially-based stance against our current President; maybe you still need a bright white light shone on what has become so painfully obvious to the majority of Americans.  Let’s remind you of what some of your other high-profile Tea Party leaders have said about the American President.  Rep. Michelle Bachmann (R-Crazytown) has publically labeled Obama’s energy policy, “a tar baby,” as well as described the President himself as, “The Ghetto Gangsta”.  Glenn Beck, when not crying or drawing on his chalkboard, has called President Obama, “a racist,” and “a guy who has a deep-seated hatred for white people or the white culture.”  Beck uttered this poisonous dreck on Fox *News Channel.  Funnily enough, Rupert Murdoch, the man who owns Fox *News, is also a major financial contributor to the Tea Party and has provided major players within the party countless opportunities to come on his network to take verbal swipes at President Obama.  Now, I would like to believe all these connected dots are little more than coincidence, and that there isn’t an actual coordinated, racially-based effort to embarrass the current President day-in-and-day-out.  But since, like millions of freethinking Americans, I’m not an idiot, I have no choice but to see you TPers for what you’ve repeatedly proven to be: politically aligned racists who would rather shut down the federal government during the first black President’s time in office than make any mature or rational effort to actually repair damaged and failing aspects of said government.  For a movement that proclaims to love our Democratic process so much, you sure cannot respect the fact that Barack Obama was elected twice to office by the American people; both times in near-landslide victories.  Wouldn’t you be taken more seriously if you instead put efforts into electing adults to Congress who then honored our Founding Fathers by working hard to change policy and create new laws for our land, rather than sharing e-mails that depict the White House lawn as a watermelon patch?  Doesn’t it make more sense to figure out ways to serve the American people with dignity and honor, rather than behave with petulance and bitterly trash our freely-elected President with protest signs that read everything from “Obama-nomics: Monkey See, Monkey Spend,” to “Obama’s Plan = White Slavery”?

Years from now it is a given that history will remind us that President Obama was the nation’s first African-American President, and perhaps it will even claim that he was an average President who had some successes and some failures.  We’ll have to wait and see.  But based on your own words and actions, TPers, there is little doubt history will be far less kind to you and to the ugly truth that motivated you to spend far too much time and effort disrespecting the President and the office which he so legitimately represents.

Irritated and onto you,


Eric Frost-Barnes


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Rest in Peace, Mandela.

December 6, 2013 at 4:43 pm (Uncategorized)

In honor of Nelson Mandela’s life, we’re posting the lyrics to Peter Gabriel’s song “Biko.”

September ’77
Port Elizabeth weather fine
It was business as usual
In police room 619
Oh Biko, Biko, because Biko
Oh Biko, Biko, because Biko
Yihla Moja, Yihla Moja
-The man is dead

When I try to sleep at night
I can only dream in red
The outside world is black and white
With only one colour dead
Oh Biko, Biko, because Biko
Oh Biko, Biko, because Biko
Yihla Moja, Yihla Moja
-The man is dead

You can blow out a candle
But you can’t blow out a fire
Once the flames begin to catch
The wind will blow it higher
Oh Biko, Biko, because Biko
Yihla Moja, Yihla Moja
-The man is dead

And the eyes of the world are
watching now
watching now


*Nelson Mandela’s lifelong crusade for racial equality not only reconciled a nation, but impacted our entire world for the better. 

Nelson Mandela  1918 – 2013

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Broadly Speaking – Comedy That Makes You Think

November 13, 2013 at 11:14 pm (Entertainers / Entertainment, Politics)

Hope all my fellow snarksters are all well.

I want to let you in on a new site / show called Broadly Speaking.  Created by two women who are very near and dear to me, Broadly Speaking is a brand new show that will be using comedy to shine bright lights on numerous issues that focus on women around the world.  We all can make a difference through our words, efforts, money, and time, and I wanted to share fantastic project right when it’s taking off.

Go to Facebook and look up Broadly Speaking.

Or go straight to their indiegogo campaign to help get things up and running.

Either way is cool.  Thanks very much in advance.

With snark-free gratitude,


JD Rourke

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Gun Control in America – 50 Years of Shooting Blanks

October 16, 2013 at 7:12 pm (Uncategorized) (, , , , , , )

 Gun Control in America – 50 Years of Shooting Blanks

Eric Frost-Barnes

This November 22nd marks the 50th anniversary of the assassination of President John Kennedy.  It’s been half a century since he was murdered by a man with a firearm.  And since 1963, we’ve witnessed the fatal shootings of Medgar Evers, Martin Luther King, Jr., Robert Kennedy, Malcolm X, and John Lennon, as well as failed assassination attempts directed at Presidents Gerald Ford and Ronald Reagan, Alabama Governor George Wallace, and U.S. Representative Gabrielle Giffords.

  • In that same fifty-year time span the American people have seen the horror of the University of Texas (1966) massacre that left 17 fellow citizens dead.
  • We witnessed 21 Americans die at a McDonald’s in San Ysidro, California (1984), and another 14 innocent civilians die at a post office barely two years later (1986) in Edmond, Oklahoma.
  • 23 more Americans died in a cafeteria shooting (1991) in Killeen, Texas.
  • We watched as 13 students and teachers were killed in a mass shooting at Columbine High School (1999) in Littleton, Colorado.
  • 32 students were shot to death at Virginia Tech (2007) in Blacksburg, Virginia.
  • Our nation grieved for 12 more Americans killed while watching a midnight movie at a theatre (2012) in Aurora, Colorado, as well as the terrible mass murder of 26 faculty and young children at Sandy Hook Elementary School (2012) in Newtown, Connecticut.

That final grim statistic of twenty-six Americans killed at Sandy Hook coincidentally matches the number of Constitutional Amendments dismissed and left-for-dead by your more wild-eyed vocal opponents of any kind of common-sense gun laws; even as those same zealots rant and rave about the sanctity of our Constitution when it comes to the absolute protection of their favorite Amendment: the 2nd.  It is also worth reminding the public that more than 8,300 Americans have died at the hands of gun violence since the Newtown massacre less than a year ago, including twelve people working at the Navy Yard in D.C.  That’s eight-thousand, three-hundred Americans – nearly three times the number of American citizens who were killed on September 11th, 2001.  If 8,300 Americans died of gun violence within our borders on a single day, reasonable common-sense laws would now be in place.  Guess it’s all in the timing for our political “leadership.”

As stated above, most of the deadliest shootings in U.S. history have occurred since the assassination of President Kennedy in 1963.  And yet, over the past fifty years the level of regulation of gun ownership in America has seemingly remained as lax as ever.  Sure, there are laws on the books, but there are an equal amount of loopholes to get around those laws, and many of these regulations differ from state to state.  And as rhetoric from gun-control opponents increases and becomes even less rational, that very loud minority seems to be standing their ground quite well – even as more and more Americans die or are injured due to gun-related violence.  And again, the ability to purchase firearms remains as easy as ever, regardless of an individual’s background or mental state. Anyone over the age of eighteen, and with enough cash, can purchase a gun without so much as showing a single piece of identification.  And that’s at many gun shows, within the light of day.  Greater scrutiny – or regulation – is used when a citizen is applying for a driver’s license or a fishing permit.

Vocal opponents of common sense gun regulation, such as universal background checks, claim that regulation could lead to a path where Americans’ firearms will be taken away.  First off, that is nonsense.  We have approximately 11.5 million illegal immigrants living here at least part time and we cannot even decide on the most effective way to decrease those numbers.  How in the wide world of sports is the U.S. government going to confiscate the more than 300-million firearms within our nation?  Here’s a hint: they aren’t.  But having would-be buyers go through mandatory background checks and day-long firearm certification courses (not to mention owning insurance policies for their firearms) before we add to that already insanely high number might just make it a little trickier for the next murderous thug to get his hands on an AR15 or Bushmaster XM-15.  At the very least, these small hurdles might help people take gun ownership more seriously and the safety courses would increase owner’s knowledge of their firearms and how to manage those weapons with a healthier respect.

Opponents also claim that regulating firearms like the Bushmaster XM-15 or ZM LR-300 will lead to a slippery-slope where The Government can take any type of weapon from its citizens.  It’s already illegal, due to governmental regulation, to own a rocket launcher or a tank, not to mention a mere silencer (in some states), yet Americans are not freaking out about their tank-driving rights being suppressed and crushed by those who hate freedom.  Point is, reasonable regulation for some lethal weapons does not, nor ever has, equate to the unreasonable regulation of all lethal weapons.

Opponents of common sense gun control also use one of their favorite sayings when debating this combustible subject matter; they will claim that “guns don’t kill people,” but rather, “It is people who kill people.”  And while it’s safe to say none of us has ever heard a nightly news story about an AK-47 walking down Main Street by itself randomly shooting folks, it is equally likely that the news has never reported on an individual going on a murderous rampage where the weapon of choice was an X-Box console or an Oliver Stone DVD.  Because certain firearms can fire so many rounds in such a short time – through the use of ammunition magazines that carry dozens of rounds – it allows these madmen an easier, more effective way to carry out their crimes.  Yes, an individual can commit unspeakable evil with a knife or other type of non-firearm, but the automatic weapon allows for a lethal efficiency that knives, hammers, Chinese stars, or plastic bags cannot.

Finally, opponents of sensible gun control laws argue that further regulation only punishes the law-abiding citizen, and that criminals will still be able to get their hands on firearms of all kinds.  Not if certain types of automatic weapons were completely off the market – across the board.  If gun manufacturers would simply put an end to making some of the weapons that are mentioned above, then no new ones would fall into the wrong hands.  And the models out there could slowly be removed from the market (save for those registered in private collections).  As for law-abiding citizens, well here’s a little inconvenient truth to remember: a lot of these mass-murderers were law-abiding citizens before they decided that life was too much for them.  Not every mass shooting is done by some masked man clad in black and running through the streets cackling like The Joker.  These terrible crimes, as well as thousands of hand-gun related shootings, occur when so-called law-abiding citizens snap over losing his or her job, or when folks believe their taxes are higher than what they think is fair, or when someone’s favorite football team suffers a shellacking on a Sunday afternoon.

If our nation can mature on this particular subject, then surely we as a society can begin to take real steps toward keeping more Americans safer when it comes to both the attaining and usage of firearms.  Yet for many opponents, evolving on gun rights is as terrifying for them as the idea of a full, tyrannical governmental takeover (where the only thing between Freedom and Communism is a forty-round clip).  And speaking of make-believe, how is it that a very outspoken minority – who at times vocalizes an unsettling amount of paranoia about The Government – is retaining control of the majority of power and “say-so” in D.C. when it comes to suppressing gun-control and the safety and peace-of-mind of the vast majority of Americans?  Why do our elected politicians ignore the facts, the will of the people – the piles of bodies – in favor of the gun-manufacturing and NRA lobbies?  Is K Street that much more valuable than our American children?

None of the facts stated above are new – but that’s the point.  There are already enough facts to justify real action.  Since JFK’s assassination, we’ve been through a half-century cycle of violence.  There is already an abundance of American support for more basic common-sense laws when it comes to gun-control.  And yet, still nothing is done by our so-called leaders and inevitably the press fades away from this subject until the next school massacre; when it once-again becomes fashionable to cover the loss of American lives due to the irrational needs of a powerful few.  It seems the only thing being “well regulated” is the effort to protect citizens from the more extreme aspects of our gun culture.

Our Constitutional rights are extremely important.  I’m not for sacrificing all of our freedoms in the name of governmental protectionism.  But when decade upon decade continues to reveal our penchant for firearm-related violence, it is time to argue less and take stronger, more decisive steps toward protecting ourselves and each other.  So far, the talk has been cruelly cheap.  The 2nd Amendment is an important part of who we are as a nation, but it is no more important than the amendments that call for a freedom of the press or for a right to a fair and speedy trial.  Far too many innocent Americans have died because an incredibly stubborn and vocal minority are unwilling to meet somewhere in the middle on gun control.  Our Constitution was written by Franklin, Hamilton, and Madison – not by Beretta, Smith, and Wesson.  Tragically, since that terrible day in November fifty years ago, it has become increasingly difficult to remember that.

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