E-mail from President Obama to the Birthers:

May 2, 2011 at 9:38 pm (Daily Headaches and Rage Inducers, Politics) (, , , , , , , , , )

E-mail: supportthebirthers@batshitinsaneracists.org

Dear Birthers,

I am writing to your clan today to apologize for not getting in touch with you folks sooner.

I would have tackled this trumped-up issue of my natural-born citizenship earlier, but I’ve been a bit busy cleaning up after the Cheney / Bush Administration and helping to BLAST THE FUCK OUTTA OSAMA BIN LADEN!!!

As “true” patriots, I’m sure you understand.

Your Commander-in-Chief,


President Barack Obama                                                                                                               a.k.a. U.S. Citizen, a.k.a. Presidential Badass


  1. bliss_infinite said,

    heh, nice.

  2. Tony said,

    Thank you for taking the time to address the ‘Birthers’, Mr. President – you saved me a lot of furious typing time tonight, ’cause if YOU weren’t going to rub it in their racist, ignorant faces, I sure as hell WOULD have.

    All I can add is that Donald Trump ain’t fooling anybody, that puckered-lip look of his didn’t happen overnight – it comes from years of intense, dedicated cock-sucking. All that money and he still can’t afford a fuckin’ idiot-alarm to keep his mouth shut, let alone a normal hairstyle or decent personality.

  3. Ania said,

    Dear President Badass: awwwRIGHT!

    Dear Navy Seals: YOU ROCK!

    Dear Donald Trump: Can you spell U R History?

    Dear JD: You are still the most enjoyable headache cure…


    Ania the Righteously Satisfied

  4. Robert Paulsen said,

    Nice letter. Not to get too picky with you Mr. President, but “clan” is a misspelling when applied to birthers.

  5. jan said,

    Good point Mr. Paulsen.
    Birthers are a klan.

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