Dear Ann Coulter,

July 2, 2011 at 1:41 am (Daily Headaches and Rage Inducers) (, , , , , )

Dear Ann Coulter,

We just heard you recently described the late Princess Diana as an “anorexic, bulimic narcissist,” and that you couldn’t understand why Americans were “gaga-eyed” over her.

Are you retarded?  Don’t answer that, the question was rhetorical.

Seriously, Ann.  Do you own a mirror?  (also rhetorical)  Because you’re so goddamned skinny you’re Adam’s apple is bigger than Clint Eastwood’s!  If you ate a cookie, you’d instantly look five months pregnant.  You’re so bony, you make Ally McBeal look like Chris Christie!

As for narcissistic, you’re one to talk (and talk, and talk).  You’re so self-important, you make Glenn Beck come off like Mother Teresa!  You’re your own Annie Wilkes, for chrissakes!

And as for those Americans who admired and followed Princess Di, have you taken a recent peek at your own fans?  (once more, rhetorical)  The people at your book-signings look like extras from The Grapes of Wrath and The Hills Have Eyes!  Your followers make Todd Palin seem like a founding member of MENSA.

Go back to defending Paula Jones, if need be, but lay off our “English Rose.”  B-yotch!

Not messing around,

.

Glass Houses

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7 Comments

  1. St. Tracy said,

    Chris Christie?

    • jdrourke said,

      Lard-assed Governor of New Jersey. A gen-u-ine douche…

  2. St. Tracy said,

    Dear Ann Coulter,

    Suck my dick.

    Love,

    Real Women of America

  3. Sharon said,

    Princess Di may have had her flaws, but she had more class in her toe nail clipping than Ann Coulter could ever hope to have

  4. bliss_infinite said,

    I need that this Saturday morning (your letter that is, not the google ad with a picture of Coulter).

  5. Carl Fihudo said,

    JD, i’ve got a few of your vintage Lampoons here. I read your post. Then I flipped thru the ‘poons & need to know-are you shitting me? I mean, if Graydon Carter can shift from Spy to VF-i get that…but Ann Coulter never was a ‘poonie.

  6. kingdietrich said,

    Joan rivers, in a stand up act she was performing in London, was bemoaning skinny bitches and imitating them: “does this tampon make me look fat?” Even though it’s questionable whether Manne Coulter actually uses such products, he-she came immediately to mind. .

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